Monica, 15, and Dave, 17, have been dating for almost a year. They have an amazing relationship and Monica knows Dave really cares about her. She’s a virgin and even though he isn’t, he has never pressured her to have sex. It’s sweet, but she kind of wishes he would make a move—she really wants to do it. One night, they’re fooling around in his room, when she starts to unbutton his pants.
Dave: Um, what are you doing?
Monica: Come on, don’t you want me as much as I want you?
Dave: Monica, I really care about you a lot. Probably more than any girl I’ve ever been with. But I had sex before I was ready with my last girlfriend and I don’t want to make that mistake again. Do you mind waiting?
You're Monica. What do you say?
"I can wait as long as you need me to. I’m really attracted to you and I want my first time to be with someone I love and expect to be with for a really long time."
"I really respect that you want to wait and I’m fine with that too. We probably should talk about protecting ourselves before we actually do it. I don’t want to do something I’ll regret either."
"You can’t be serious. There are a ton of boys at school who’d give anything to get me in bed. Don’t you think I’m sexy?"
"I can wait, but I don’t really see what the big deal is. It’s not like you’re a virgin."
Most teens who have had sex wish that they had waited. And you can always say no—even if you’ve said yes before.
Deanna and Drew, both 17, are “friends with benefits.” They have sex, but they aren’t in a serious relationship. At first Deanna thought she could handle sex with no strings attached, but now she thinks that she is falling for Drew. She’s online one night when Drew sends her a message on Facebook: “Are you alone, sexy? Can I come over?”
You're Deanna. What do you do?
Log off. You need time to think before you see Drew again.
Write back and let Drew know that you guys need to talk. The whole "sex with no strings" thing isn’t working for you anymore.
Tell him yes. If you keep having sex with him, maybe he’ll fall in love with you too.
Ask Drew if he wants to meet for coffee. It’ll be easier to tell him that you want to stop having sex with him if you’re not alone in a room together.
Mistaking sex for love can leave you unfulfilled and lead to risky sexual situations. One in five teens say that most of their friends are in “unhealthy” relationships - those without love, trust, respect, and honesty. Remember, it’s okay to be friends without benefits.
Emma, 16, has been on the pill for almost a year now, but she hasn’t told her mom – she knows her mom will go ballistic. One day, her mother finds an empty pill packet in the wastebasket in Emma’s room. When Emma comes home from school, her mom is sitting at the kitchen table, the empty packet in front of her.
You're Emma. What do you say?
"Those aren’t mine, they’re Kelly’s. She was afraid to throw them away at her own house."
"I’m sorry I didn’t tell you mom. I was afraid you’d be mad at me for having sex. I did want to talk to you about it. I know you’ve always told me to be safe, and that’s why I decided to go on the pill and use condoms—every time I have sex."
"I can’t believe you were snooping through my things. I may be having sex, but at least I’m being safe."
Nothing. See what she has to say first. Even though this wasn’t the best way to start a conversation, maybe she’ll have something worthwhile to say.
Three out of every ten girls in the United States get pregnant at least once before age 20. That's more than 730,000 teen pregnancies each year.
Maria’s older sister, Christina, and her husband, just had their first baby. Maria, 16, loves to baby-sit. In fact, she loves the baby so much; she thinks she might want one of her own. When Christina comes back from running an errand, Maria drops a bombshell:
Maria: So Theo and I have been having sex for a while now.
Christina: I didn’t know that.
Maria: Yeah. We use condoms most of the time, but I don’t think it really matters. If I got pregnant, I’d be SO happy. I want to be a young mom.
You’re Christina. What do you say?
"Maria, wake up! Being a mother is an expensive, full-time job. How can you afford a child, when you haven’t even graduated from high school yet? Forget whether or not you’re ready for a kid – I don’t even think you’re ready for sex."
"Have you thought this through? Being a mother is a lot harder than being a babysitter. Have you discussed this with Theo?"
"You’re pretty young, so the odds of you getting pregnant are slim. But you should probably use condoms no matter what."
"Being a mom is great, but there is a lot that you need to accomplish first. Don’t rush things. A child is a lifetime commitment. Babies require unconditional love, not to mention stable parents who can afford to care for them 24/7."
Got an extra $10,000? Because that’s at least how much it cost to raise a baby for the first year. How about $250,530? That’s what it’ll cost you to raise a kid for 18 years.
Laura and Amy are bored one Saturday afternoon so they start taking goofy pictures of each other with Laura’s camera phone. At first its just funny faces and model poses, but then Amy lifts up her shirt and Laura snaps a picture of her. “I’m so sending this to Mike,” says Laura.
You're Amy. What do you say?
"Ha! Do it! He’s so hot. Maybe he’ll return the favor and send me a picture of his naked butt."
"No, don’t! I don’t want him to get the wrong idea. I like him, but I’m not ready to hook up yet."
"You have to delete that picture immediately. That was really dumb of me. I don’t want that pic to get forwarded to everyone at school. Don’t you watch Gossip Girl?"
"Go ahead. Now he’ll see what he’s missing."
Here’s something for you to think about before you press SEND: One-third of teens say that their peers who share sexy text messages and images of themselves are “expected” to put out. Is that really the impression you want to make?
Lindsey and James, both 16, have been dating for a year. Both have had sex before—with other people—and James hates wearing condoms. One night, as things heat up, Lindsey stops him.
Lindsey: Do you have any condoms?
James: No I told you, I hate those things. I thought you said you were going to go on the pill.
Lindsey: I don’t know. I need to get a doctor’s prescription to go on it. If I tell my mom I want to see a gynecologist, she’s going to get suspicious.
James: Can we talk about this later? It’s really killing the mood, and having unprotected sex one time isn’t going to get you pregnant.
If you were Lindsey, what would you say?
"It’s not just pregnancy we have to worry about. How do I know you don’t have an STD? Even if I do go on the pill, you’re wearing a condom. We’ve waited this long, we may as well do this the right way."
"I don’t know. I feel like it’s still really risky. But if you really want to and you swear you’ll pull out..."
"You’re right. I’ve never heard of anyone getting pregnant their first time."
"Let’s talk about this first, OK? What’s starting to kill the mood for me is the fact that you don’t seem to care too much about whether or not we’re being safe."
More than half of teens say that one of the main reasons teens do not use birth control is because their partners don't want to. If you have sex without using protection there’s an 85%-90% chance you’ll get pregnant or get someone else pregnant within one year.
How do you score?
![]()
What Next?
